Sunday, October 25, 2009

PARLAY GOES 9-2 this week!

If you listened to the show, YOU GOT PAID

We hit:

Chargers
Patriots
Niners (covered +4)
Colts
Packers
Bills
Bengals
Saints
Cowboys

We missed:

Jets
Vikings

Tonight, we took the Giants -7 and Monday Night we like the Eagles -7

G'luck!

Saturday, October 17, 2009

Now Look at you!!! I told you not to use Sidekicks!

Week 6 Picks



Yessa, Yesa, this edition of Parlay Picks brought to you by the 2nd Most Famous Short Person in the World Behind Eddie Huang..... aka Joe Pesci

Chiefs @ Redskins -6.5. 81% of Vegas is taking the Chiefs. Take the Chiefs! The Redskins covered last week, God knows its not happening two weeks in a row. I expect Tom Cruise to be coaching by halftime.

Texans @ Bengals -5 = 71% of Vegas is taking the Bengals, we agree, they run the ball and the Texans can't stop anyone and their offense stalls in the first half. IF the Texans offense could consistently score 28 points, we'd take them, but their offense is not dominant enough to carry that wack defense.

Browns @ Steelers -14 = 81% of Vegas taking the Steelers. Take the steelers. Division game, at home, Polamalu should finally be back. They have not been covering but the browns are that bad. Hopefully with Polamalu back, we can start taking the Steelers to cover going forward because the last few weeks the defense has broken down in the second half.

Ravens @ Vikings -3 = 51% of Vegas is taking the Vikings, this is a great line. Take the Vikings -3 at home. Teams always give 3 points at home, by leaving it at 3, vegas is telling you they think these teams are even. I don't, the vikings are better.

Rams @ Jaguars -9.5 = 52% of Vegas is taking the jaguars. I don't like taking bad teams with big spreads just because of the matchup. Yes, Jacksonville could easily put up 30 on the Rams, but they are not consistent so its not worth your money to bet this game. If you have to.... Take the Jags.

Giants @ Saints -3 = 95% of Vegas is taking the Giants, we agree. This is a tough call. Game of the week. The Saints have passed every test thrown their way this season and I would not be surprised if they win. Shit, I actually THINK they'll win. BUT, as a gambling man, you want to bet with your head, not just on instincts. Ask yourself, have the Saints had to "grind out" a tough win against a dominant defensive line yet? No. They would have had to against the Eagles, but with McNabb out, it wasn't a match. The Jets shot themselves in the foot consistently on offense and the Saints never had to dig deep. The Giants are the most consistent team in the NFL the last 3 years. Eli is earning his money (something I thought I'd never say) and you know Coughlin's team is always going to show up. Even with the flak that Brandon Jacobs has been getting, people need to understand, the brotha is doin his THANG. His job is to run it up the middle, beat up the defense, and then Bradshaw comes in like DJ Webstar to dance on em. Take the Giants because the Saints have not shown you they can beat a team like them. P.S. Raf is taking the Saints. P.P.S. Raf also lives on top of a tire shop that sells PAINTED ON TREADS. So, if you bet with Raf, you bet with Bin Laden..... I'm just saying.

Panthers @ Buccaneers +3 = 86% take the Panthers, take the panthers! The Bucs are unwatchable. Any team that has lost to the Redskins this year should be shipped to Dubai. Start a league there. Dubai has everything now. Magnolia, Shake Shack, I'm sure they want the Buccaneers too. This is the type of game you bet because the team is shitty. You don't take the Jags to cover 9.5 against anyone, but -3 is easy, the Panthers are fully capable of it.

Lions @ Packers -13.5 = 54% of Vegas takes the lions. we take lions. The Packers should win. No doubt about that but the Lions are not as bad as you think. They covered against the Steelers and they'll do it against the Packers because the Packers offensive line can't protect Rodgers and their defensive front 7 underachieves.

Eagles at Raiders +14 = 92% of Vegas takes the Eagles, it should be 100 Eagles. Which 8 idiots are betting the Raiders? Their kids should just give up on college now cause there is absolutely no college fund when your dumb ass parents are betting the Raiders to do anything. Tom Cable is still my favorite coach in the NFL. Its not his fault that his assistants have glass chins. If only the rest of the Raiders were as hard as Cable.....

Cardinals @ Seabirds -3 = 73% of Vegas is taking the Cardinals, we take the Seabirds. Hasselbeck is tearin it up and the Cardinals refuse to run the ball. I had no idea Matt Hasselbeck was the 4th Manning brother, but apparently after the heat rock he dropped on the Jags, Mr. Balding is the 4th Manning Brother.

Bills @ Jets -9.5 = 59% of Vegas is taking the Jets, we like the Jets. Nobody likes the Bills. Let TO play quarterback. Again, just to re-hash the betting on matchups philosophy. Don't bet against a bad team just for the hell of it, bet against a bad team if its a low spread, AND bet against a bad team if they are playing a good team coming off a loss like the Jets because it will be a "value line" like this.

Titans @ Patriots -9 = 89% of Vegas is taking the Patriots. We like that. The Titans have no secondary. I heard Al Bundy and Polk High threw for 8 touchdowns against the Titans on Thursday night.

Bears @ Falcons -3 = 85% of Vegas is taking the Falcons. We like the Falcons. They came up big against a tough SF team at home. We are "renting" the Falcons. Not buying, renting. They surprised me last week against SF. As Ali G said, "RESPEKT!"

Broncos at Chargers -3.5 = Broncos all day baby. 70% of Vegas is taking the Broncos. We like that. Raf likes norv turner, thus, Raf likes losing and is taking the Chargers. WE ARE TAKING THE BRONCOS. When you ride with Norv Turner, you're on a highway to hell.

Friday, October 9, 2009

Week 5 Picks

Vikings @ Rams +10 - 99% take vikes
Take the Vikes. There may be a monday night hangover, but the Rams are the worst team in the league. Chester Taylor could beat these guys himself.

Cowboys @ Chiefs +8 - 72% take KC
Take the Cowboys. They need this win, just like the Skins needed one last week. They'll bounce back. Romo eats up bad defenses as he's a boom or bust guy. I would take a upset against the cowboys, but the Chiefs are that bad, I can't conceive anyway they win. The chiefs need to beat the raiders this year to prevent going undefeated.

Skins @ Panthers - 3.5 - 92% take Panthers
Stay away from this game, but if you have to take someone take the Skins. Panthers coming off a bye, I want to take them, but not -3.5. If you can get the Panthers -3, take it. But the extra half point is going to kill you. The skins run defense has not been shutdown like it should so the Panthers should run the ball, but Delhomme will have trouble with the skins secondary. These teams are both a mess but the skins seem to be crawling out from the dark. They showed up for the second half last week and if they can just start a game strong, they'll beat the Panthers. The Skins corners have had trouble tackling so Steve Smith could get a lot of YAC yards but he won't get deep. The skins miss Greg Williams. The defense has never been the same since he left and Greg Blache might be the least creative mind this side of Jim Zorn. Look at what Greg Williams is doing with the Saints D! They have a personality.

Bucs @ Eagles -15 - 74% take Eagles
Take the Eagles. I want to take the Bucs because McNabb has played one half of football this year. BUT, they are coming off a bye, they've had a lot of time to rest and prepare. The defense should come out on fire and beat the bucs themselves. The Bucs are just too one-dimensional on offense and can't stop the run. I would be weary of this game though. 15 points is a lot for a team with a qb coming back from injury.

Bengals @ Ravens -8.5 - 58% take ravens
Take the Ravens. The Ravens faced their first test last week and put up a good fight. Were it not for a momentum killing opening fumble, I think the Ravens win. They shut down the Patriots run game and Flacco can throw on anyone. This kid doesn't even have a #1 receiving option and he's eating up secondaries. The Bengals have been good this year, but Carson Palmer has yet to get hot and I don't think its going to happen this week. The Bengals have gutted out a lot of close wins, but I think the Ravens D is too much.

Steelers @ Lions +10.5 - 79% take steelers
Stay away from this game. I take the steelers if I have to. But, they broke down again last week at the end of the game against SD. They still covered, but I just don't trust a team that doesn't close the game out. I would take the lions, but with Stafford iffy, you can't take them.

Raiders @ Giants -14.5 - 68% take Giants
Take the Raiders. Manning should play this week, but if they get a lead, he's coming out of the game. 14.5 is a lot of points for any team and knowing Manning is injured and unlikely to play a full game if the Giants get ahead, I don't think they'll cover. The raiders are horrible right now. All that talk about running the ball and having a stout secondary went out the window in week three. They are who you thought they were.....

Browns @ Bills -6 - 72% take Bills
Bills need a bounce back win, the Browns need A WIN. But after trading away their best offensive player, on the road in Buffalo, take the bills. 6 points is a lot for a crappy team like the bills, but they're at home and the Browns are EXTRA shittay.

Falcons @ 49ers -2.5 - 63% take SF
Take the Niners. The Falcons have a lot of shiny weapons on offense, but they ran into a wall against NE. I like that the Falcons are coming off a bye and will no doubt force feed ROddy White, but the Niners should stop the run like they have all season and I don't think Matt Ryan can carry this team against the SF secondary. All the talk this offseason about "Matty ice" being the next great young QB, look, Flacco and Sanchez are better.

Texans @ Cardinals -5.5 - 59% take Cards
Take the Cards. This will be the week they finally run the ball. The Texans can't stop the run and they can't run it either. Even against the raiders, Slaton got TDs, but not that many yards. It will be a shootout.

Pats @ Broncos +3 - 89% take Pats
Take the Broncos. McDaniel v. Belichick. The Broncos are hot right now and the Patriots just squeaked one out against a good Ravens team. Without Fred Taylor, I think they will have trouble running the ball. He was their most effective back and the Broncos Secondary is air tight. Marshall is back and when you can run the ball like the Broncos can, you can win any game.

Colts @ Titans +3.5 - 95% take Colts
Colts. Titans are bums. Can't stop the pass. Manning could throw for 500.

Jets @ Dolphins +2 - 94% take Jets
Jets. Braylon Edwards, Monday night, no hangover from NO. They will be focused and ready to eat some mahi.